is what you'd be if you are in Montreal today. We're supposed to get 2 or 3 inches of rain or something from the remnants of Hurricane Katrina. Ouch, but nothin' compared to what the folk down in the Big Easy are going through. Intense stuff.


Port Moody, that is.

Official Message in a Barrel Postcard barrel number three is now in place.

The barrel is located in the Port Moody Station Museum, the current official location of the Western Terminus of the CPR. Apparently the extension West to Vancouver is a 'branch' line. That's just about the most awesome thing I've ever heard.

Now I know there's a gang of you out there from the 604 who frequent this blog, so why not swing by the Port Moody Station museum, er, Western Terminus of the CPR, to put your message in the barrel? It'd be crime not to.

Fan See


In an attempt to clear out the clutter that is our apartment, I did something that was very difficult:

I left my fan in the street.

Now, it was a tough decision, but it had to be done. The apartment was packed to the gills with stuff and a few people gave me new fans recently, so it had to go. Sorry Dad.

I never saw who took it. I left it on the corner and walked down the street. When I turned back it was gone. Maybe the guy on the bike got it. Maybe that grey Mazda turned the corner and crushed it into oblivion. Maybe a sweaty man more that half a century old solved a family dimemma. These are all strong possibilites, but I have a feeling that somebody else swooped in and got his grimy little hands on it. Somebody extremely dangerous and stealth-like. Perhaps evil.


Today was a good day. Sold heaps of old crap on the sidewalk and made some cash. It's amazing what people will buy on impulse from the sidewalk. Do you want to capitalize on that BC lions t-shirt you got back in the 90s as a free gift when you signed up for that credit card in the shopping mall? Easy. Drop that sucker on the sidewalk and tell the first 50 year old guy wearing a walkman that passes by to give you two bucks for it.

Also made a few trades, most notably with my new hero, Richard. As far as random sidewalk trading goes, Richard is the man. Who shows up at a sidewalk rummage sale wearing a shirt emblazoned with cows and horses and wants to trade it? Richard does. Who gives you an Elvis keychain in exchange for a pair of those really big oversize novelty fun sunglasses? Richard does. Who puts on his new red shirt and sunglasses and proceeds to serenade your girlfriend with 'Love me tender'. Richard does.



Ebay had 5 cent listings today, so I went on a listing rampage to end all listing rampages. If you wanna see what I'm talking about, go to ebay.com and search "one red paperclip" .........if you dare.

ALL my listings start at ONE CENT, have free shipping and don't have a reserve price, so you'd be a fool not to bid!


I love this kind of stuff:

organic bananas

Save the planet! Fertilizer and insectisides are BAD, but styrofoam and plastic are good. Reminds me of the guy I worked with on an oil rig who told me, while he smoked a cigarette, "You're eating Corn Flakes? Huh, that crap will kill you. It's full of Round-Up."

Park King

I went to the Tam Tams yesterday. It's pretty much a weekly woodstock in a big park here in Montreal. Most people either bang on drums, blaze joints, drink beer, smoke cigarettes, join in a medieveal battle, sneeze, dance, tightrope walk, buy a new bong, talk about humus, beg, pass out, play hackeysack wearing a headband, piss their pants, get arrested, play their accordion, sell stuff from Thailand or India, trip out, dance with their wooden snake, dance with their real snake or all of the above.

But not me.

I just handed out "informational literature" about smokeless tobacco for a marketing company I'm working for. Yes evil, I know -- but evil that pays $11 an hour and scores me a green shirt and a cream blazer, so I'm prepared to let it slide for now.

I'm working with this chick named Melissa who parked outside my apartment for just five minutes and managed to get a herself a parking ticket in that time. On a Sunday. Pretty ridiculous, if you consider how easy it is to understand Montreal parking signs.


Livin' the dream

Went to Vermont today.
Lots of really good stuff happened.
Including this:


Mr. Merchandise

Two posts in one day...yep, it's outta hand. Okay, I just found out about cafepress.com today, so I've been on a merchandising binge. I put together all the stuff in the links below, all you gotta do is click and buy!

one red paperclip merch:

Lame or cool, depending-on-how-you-look-at-them, slogans:

And then there’s the obligatory ridiculous and embarrassing stuff created using pictures of people I know – stuff I’ll surely pay for later.


Ah Quebec, you've done it again: Where else can you enter a mosh pit at a bar with a full caraffe of wine in one hand, a full glass in the other, then get pushed over, lose your prescription eyeglasses, then find them again, all mangled and bent -- next to a pack of smokes like this?



This pretty much sums up everything that's wrong, and right, with the world.

Anti-drunk driving campaigns are useless anyhow. As long as 24-hour drive-thru is legal, the world will continue to drink and drive.

Chromeo says: The future is Synth


Chromeo's radical. And awesome. And perhaps choice. Any concert set in an empty swimming pool that features a synthesizer-talk box played by a badass gangsta in disguise as a navy admiral and a glasses-clad lead singer who plays a so-sharp-it-hurts triangular guitar and opens with "Hey, our name is Chromeo and all of our songs are about girls", is a good one in my books. Dave 1 and Pee Thugg rule the rocksteady electro funk love jam sky. Their website tells the truth: "Live, Chromeo is more fun than being forced to smoke crack at gunpoint by Rick James."

And I didn't even wear a jean shirt.

Me with two Daves but only one Dave One:

Dave Two. P-Thugg. Fist.

Paper is over-rated.
And expensive.

one red paperclip fever

It's official: one red paperclip fever has spread. I'm not the only one with the disease anymore:
If you wanna play your own game of 'one red paperclip', then give'er. The more the merrier.

Friday Night:
Ah, Quebec: The only Canadian province that allows you to impulse buy cold six packs while pumping gas in your favorite jean shirt. Going to a Chromeo concert tonight. An epic evening surely in the works...quite possibly epic enough to warrant the purchase of a new jean shirt -- if, of course, that isn't too casual.

High Five

I woke up this morning and found a $5 PayPal donation in my inbox. I've had the donation tab over there on the left hand side since March but this is the first time anyone has actually donated something. I know it's not much, but it's the thought that counts. I didn't reach for the Kleenex, but I can honestly say that I was touched. Thank you anonymous internet donator, whoever you are.

This small but significant donation brought two thoughts to my mind:
1: Wow, someone out there in cyberspace land actually enjoys the content on this site -- enough to pay for it!
2: I bet they read this and felt sorry for me.

Either way, it was a great way to start the day--sort of like an early morning monetary-based internet high-five.

Please don't feel sorry for me or think that you need to make a donation to continue to view this site --- I know I wouldn't.

Zip it

Is it just me, or does everybody enter '90210' as their ZIP code when they sign up for a membership at a web site?

Iced Out


I've decided that real work is for suckers. It's much more enjoyable to get paid to do nothing than actually work. I "worked" as an extra on the set of the "smash hit" youth TV show '15/Love' today. The casting director told me to go downstairs and dress up as a painter. I did, and fully expected to come back up and get suckered into painting a wall or something like that. Whatever, I was on the clock anyways, right? Instead, I came back upstairs and got paid to sit on a chair and watch actors deliver career-enhancing lines like: "Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?" and "She's got more moves than a bowl of Jello."

Then a guy named Guido made me this $1 ring.

All in all, a good day at the office.